I know I have not been on for a while, and for good reason. I had another operation called and auxillary node disection. It sucks big time I will not lie but and there is a but, it helps with the diagnosis process. This is where they take out some more lymph nodes, ya know the ones they left there before? This time it has caused a bit of a problem, but nothing I can't live with *wink-wink. Consider the alternative. So I am numb most of the time and feel like my right side of of chest and underarm is in a tight sleeve or lets say tournique. Ok so now I have this forever weird feeling but it's ok! The good news is that there were no more infected lymph nodes, so now on with the plan. Plan, did I say plan? Thoes that know me I am one of the worst planners, I rather do things on the spur of the moment but that is why I have doctors so they can plan.
The next thing I had was a port installed in my arm on the other side. Oh joy of joys I have this ugly and I mean ugly big bump on my arm. My whole arm turned black and blue and purple and red blah blah blah. The pain was untoleralble for quite a while and I made a new friend whose name is Percoset. Well that was a short lived friendship because I really don't like the way my new friend treated me although he did help me sleep at night. I do not do well with medications that alter my brainwaves to the point of the duh huhs. So anyway I managed to get an infection in the whole arm, up my neck ect. Antibiodicts were next. So where did the good doctor send me? The emergency room. BIG MISTAKE! After 11 hours of sitting around with alot of sick people they sent me home...
Got the flu, oh no! what the heck did I do? Karma for me is not good these days and I keep wondering what the hell did I do to get this? Well nothing really but allow me some dramatics for goodness sake! So finally after missing the Relay for Life I am starting to get over it but still have a horrible cough. Did I mention all through this I have been trying to quit smoking, house train a puppy, and gear myself up for what comes next? LOL life is weird! Needless to say, I am still smoking, the puppy is somewhat trained and I am scared to death.
Chemo comes next Thursday. This is where they inject you with poision. My hair will fall out, and a host of other things could happen. Grose! I know how vain I am about my hair. Shameless as it is, I am. All my life I didn't hear, how pretty I was, no no but I did alway hear how pretty my hair was. Now I won't even have that. Do I care? you bet I do but hell that is a small price to pay to see my Grancchildren yet to be born, and the ones that are here to be loved by me. No one can love them more than I can. So to deal with this I am trying to talk myself into getting it cut this weekend. I will donate my long braids to locks of love, just like last year but can I keep going on the extent of hair that will come off? If I thought I could drink and party I would but not this time, well maybe a beer or two won't hurt.
All in all not sure when I will be back, not sure anyone reads this crap but I write and read and laugh at myself after. Self amusement, almost sounds dirty! LOL